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I only netted three entries last month. That's rough, man. I only need one a week to get four, and I didn't even hit that mark. Lemme tell you, you know, we all have our reasons. I don't know how great mine are. I know that I've sat down here and written something up, then deleted it several times in the last week.
Plenty of words are never seen.
There's something in particular I want to post because I've almost posted it several times and it's nothing but complaining about something that's so old hat by now that me not getting over it is a real mark of immaturity. Fuck it, though. Nearly every time I sit down, I'm thinking maybe something about politics or maybe something about friendship or whatever, and I think about the time I got de-friended in real life from someone important to me and I think it's shitty. It eats up my posting processing power, so I figure if I just write the post, I never have to write another word about it ever again. The End. Case closed.
So, like, I guess about two months ago I was chatting with an acquaintance who's bad at politics and critical thinking on Google +, which I don't think you ever hear anyone say because it's G+. She name-dropped me as having posted something from Daily Kos because, surprise surprise, I'm a great big commie and she didn't agree with it because she's a Republican by way of FOX News. This is the part where I'm supposed to say we got into a big fucking row over it, but we actually didn't. I said I wasn't gonna talk about it on Google + because (1) it's a bad venue to have a real conversation and (2) nobody is actually on G+ and I assumed I was hallucinating in the first place.
If it's anything I've learned after all this time, it's that publicly debating with hallucinations is considered rude, minimally, and a reasonable basis by which to incarcerate you, depending on your venue.
The exact ins and outs of this get tl;dr pretty quickly. It's tl;dwrite for me, too, so I'm not interested in getting into it except to say that Violet blows up my phone then hangs up on me pretty late in the evening. Called me a bully. An internet bully. Wouldn't return my calls, de-friended me on the one or two places she's still at online. That shit is hurtful. Sure, I'm here now saying, "Woah, no, fuck you." but at the time, I was kind of in shock. What do you do about that kind of thing?
It's had something of a chilling effect on me online. I clammed up about a lot of things that are important to me. Then I realized that I wasn't being the bully, here. Saying I wouldn't stoop to engage in name-calling online or engaging in conversation when something's brought up in a public way in a public forum isn't being a bully, but having someone call you up in the middle of the night and use their friendship as a lever to get an expected result is. The person's who revoked our 'friendship' wasn't really my friend anymore, and in a lot of ways, isn't even all that similar to the person I became friends with in the first place. I'd say it's sad, and I guess it kind of is because we'd been friends for a really long time, but people change. And sometimes, when that happens, the person they become isn't the kind of person you want to associate with,and that's as true for me as it is for her.
And now I never have to spend any more time on it again, ever. For all that I believe the above in a philosophical kind of way, I can also comfortably say, "and good riddance."
Plenty of words are never seen.
There's something in particular I want to post because I've almost posted it several times and it's nothing but complaining about something that's so old hat by now that me not getting over it is a real mark of immaturity. Fuck it, though. Nearly every time I sit down, I'm thinking maybe something about politics or maybe something about friendship or whatever, and I think about the time I got de-friended in real life from someone important to me and I think it's shitty. It eats up my posting processing power, so I figure if I just write the post, I never have to write another word about it ever again. The End. Case closed.
So, like, I guess about two months ago I was chatting with an acquaintance who's bad at politics and critical thinking on Google +, which I don't think you ever hear anyone say because it's G+. She name-dropped me as having posted something from Daily Kos because, surprise surprise, I'm a great big commie and she didn't agree with it because she's a Republican by way of FOX News. This is the part where I'm supposed to say we got into a big fucking row over it, but we actually didn't. I said I wasn't gonna talk about it on Google + because (1) it's a bad venue to have a real conversation and (2) nobody is actually on G+ and I assumed I was hallucinating in the first place.
If it's anything I've learned after all this time, it's that publicly debating with hallucinations is considered rude, minimally, and a reasonable basis by which to incarcerate you, depending on your venue.
The exact ins and outs of this get tl;dr pretty quickly. It's tl;dwrite for me, too, so I'm not interested in getting into it except to say that Violet blows up my phone then hangs up on me pretty late in the evening. Called me a bully. An internet bully. Wouldn't return my calls, de-friended me on the one or two places she's still at online. That shit is hurtful. Sure, I'm here now saying, "Woah, no, fuck you." but at the time, I was kind of in shock. What do you do about that kind of thing?
It's had something of a chilling effect on me online. I clammed up about a lot of things that are important to me. Then I realized that I wasn't being the bully, here. Saying I wouldn't stoop to engage in name-calling online or engaging in conversation when something's brought up in a public way in a public forum isn't being a bully, but having someone call you up in the middle of the night and use their friendship as a lever to get an expected result is. The person's who revoked our 'friendship' wasn't really my friend anymore, and in a lot of ways, isn't even all that similar to the person I became friends with in the first place. I'd say it's sad, and I guess it kind of is because we'd been friends for a really long time, but people change. And sometimes, when that happens, the person they become isn't the kind of person you want to associate with,and that's as true for me as it is for her.
And now I never have to spend any more time on it again, ever. For all that I believe the above in a philosophical kind of way, I can also comfortably say, "and good riddance."
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