![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
I effectively had two things I wanted to post today, the WIR continuation and just... stuff going on in my life. I haven't yet received any letters from anyone in the letter writing club, but I'm not terribly concerned about it, I guess. I'll be writing to only a few people in general, and some will probably be pleased to receive a communication from me that isn't absolutely insane with liquor. (The internet hears all about me when I fuck my shit up, but not so much from me when I'm in my usual lucid state, so this might be a pleasant change of pace for many.)
I've been using what's kind of a goofy website for effectively getting me to stay on task with stuff I need to do called HabitRPG. In fact, it's frequently open in a separate tab where I can check what it is I need to do when I've been sitting on my can for too long. I have a very short list of things that I expect myself to keep up with daily - stuff like laundry and the dishes, where I basically decide that any real effort made putting away or putting up dishes counts towards one or putting away, collecting, or running and drying counts for the other. You check something off the list, it gives you experience and points (which I'm less interested in, since I mostly just like checking things off lists) and it turns a color. Cool colors mean you're doing things in a timely way or that you're doing things reliably often. Warm colors suggest that you may be dropping the ball. For me, it's just an effective way of keeping a color coded paperless list, but like I said, it's been very helpful thus far.
Is also ensures that I stay very busy, since I put every little thing I've been meaning to do on the list and then scramble to check them off before I swamp myself. It's gotten to the point that other good habits I try to keep up with, like giving myself time to relax and finish books, games, and projects i've started end up on the list, too. At least I'm organized.
Our mower broke a while ago, and we ended up having a neighbor with a yard-tending service help us with the front, but he's not able to get the mower through the gate in the back. The back ended up getting so bad that the grass actually stopped getting taller because it was literally as tall as it could get, effectively making our back yard hundreds of square feet of literal midwestern prairie. Katie kind of liked it. I liked it a little less, because it made getting to the garden impossible and resulted in a totally overgrown garden with struggling plants. The city (and maybe one of our neighbors) liked it even less, because we got a letter on our front stoop saying to cut it or else. With little immediate alternative, I charged up the weed wacker batteries and started in on it. A little over a week later, the whole thing's cut and ready to be attended to by an actual lawn mower of some kind, but ours is still broken. Borrowing one is a pain, so either Katie'll get the electric one fixed or I might even opt to borrow or acquire a manual mower. They're a pain, but Kay's so big on sustainability that it might be the best choice for the household. It's not like our lawn is painfully huge or anything, and the exercise doesn't hurt.
Anyhow, that means the yard is ready for phase two - trimming the sides and near the gardens, setting the bricks better in the herb and vegetable gardens, and trimming all the goddamned fucking pokeberry I hate so much.
Edit : Oh and since it's the third, I'll share this month's unofficial reading list. Items crossed out where already read this month. Milk : Momofuku Milk Bar - Christina Tosi
the World of Darkness - Bridges, Chillot, Cliffe, and Lee with additional material
the God-Machine Chronicle The Wasteland and Other Poems - T.S. Eliot
A Brief History of Time - Stephen Hawking
The Ocean at the End of the Lane - Neil Gaiman
Oryx and Crake - Margaret Atwood
Anything else is a bonus, of course.
Tags:
I'm looking at our liquor shelf, which was populated rapidly following the wedding through generous donations from friends and a little bit from our own wedding money and has been slowly depleted over time. There's a few things on the shelf (or had been on the shelf) that seem like they're going to become somewhat of a constant in terms of what we've come to drink.
Like, it seems that we'll probably just get another big ass handle of Kraken dark rum when we finish what we've got, because it's an easy (though somewhat dangerous) thing to drink by itself or mixed, and it's just not that pricey for the quality. Handles or fifths of New Amsterdam gin and vodka look to be what we'll be purchasing as drinks of choice and convenience, as well. Our friend Paul gifted us with some Peabody Jones Vodka at the reception, and I really like it, but it looks to be something of a headache to get in this area. I like that, though. It's something to enjoy while it lasts. Our friend Marie gifted us with some Basil Hayden's bourbon whiskey, and Katie and I both like that as well, but I don't think that we've settled on that as something that'll be on our shelf all the time like New Amsterdam (due to solid drinkability and taste) and Kraken are likely to be.
I also liked the Tanqueray we got. It tends to be a little pricier, but I don't mind that much. I think our gin might end up on rotation, just like we'll sporadically get different or even more than one vodka selection. Our friends tend to be bourbon drinkers (even rotgut, which causes me to make a face these days), but I still like neutral spirits even though I'm coming to drink bourbon and other whiskeys a little more.
As kind of an aside, and I know this comes up sporadically, but I'm kind of pleased at how long our liquor is lasting. Getting a wide selection does kind of spread out what we drink, but getting nicer stuff that I don't just feel like I should blow through makes me appreciate what I'm drinking more. I've made a specific effort not to get drunk as much (in which I mean, I don't want to get as drunk and I don't drink as often), and the times I've kind of fucked up are when I specifically am trying to get drunk. A few weeks ago, I kind of made that connection. I'm a little old to be making such an obvious connection, you know? In my opinion, though, that's not worth beating yourself up about; you come to realizations when you come to them. It's not like you can go back and retroactively tell yourself, or anything like that.
I guess I'm saying that I'm improving myself by degrees, just like I'm eating better and exercising a little more and making the effort to study and write actively. That's really an entry for another day.
Like, it seems that we'll probably just get another big ass handle of Kraken dark rum when we finish what we've got, because it's an easy (though somewhat dangerous) thing to drink by itself or mixed, and it's just not that pricey for the quality. Handles or fifths of New Amsterdam gin and vodka look to be what we'll be purchasing as drinks of choice and convenience, as well. Our friend Paul gifted us with some Peabody Jones Vodka at the reception, and I really like it, but it looks to be something of a headache to get in this area. I like that, though. It's something to enjoy while it lasts. Our friend Marie gifted us with some Basil Hayden's bourbon whiskey, and Katie and I both like that as well, but I don't think that we've settled on that as something that'll be on our shelf all the time like New Amsterdam (due to solid drinkability and taste) and Kraken are likely to be.
I also liked the Tanqueray we got. It tends to be a little pricier, but I don't mind that much. I think our gin might end up on rotation, just like we'll sporadically get different or even more than one vodka selection. Our friends tend to be bourbon drinkers (even rotgut, which causes me to make a face these days), but I still like neutral spirits even though I'm coming to drink bourbon and other whiskeys a little more.
As kind of an aside, and I know this comes up sporadically, but I'm kind of pleased at how long our liquor is lasting. Getting a wide selection does kind of spread out what we drink, but getting nicer stuff that I don't just feel like I should blow through makes me appreciate what I'm drinking more. I've made a specific effort not to get drunk as much (in which I mean, I don't want to get as drunk and I don't drink as often), and the times I've kind of fucked up are when I specifically am trying to get drunk. A few weeks ago, I kind of made that connection. I'm a little old to be making such an obvious connection, you know? In my opinion, though, that's not worth beating yourself up about; you come to realizations when you come to them. It's not like you can go back and retroactively tell yourself, or anything like that.
I guess I'm saying that I'm improving myself by degrees, just like I'm eating better and exercising a little more and making the effort to study and write actively. That's really an entry for another day.
It's a really beautiful day out, today. Sadly, Katie's out doing cool fun stuff (yay!) and I gotta go to work from 3-9 (eh), so we're not gonna see each other until after I get off work tomorrow. I'm hoping that I can get enough housework done to surprise 'em on Sunday, but it'll probably depend on how tired I end up being.
I should, depending on how busy it gets, be finishing pick training today. That means I get to be bossed around on a pick as I (too slowly) grab orders for increasingly impatient customers who want their bedroom sets for a .25 an hour raise. The actual best case scenario is me getting trained up on weekdays to familiarize myself with where products go in the warehouse racks so I'll actually probably be busy during the weekdays. That'll put my wage up to a hefty 9.75 per hour. Sometimes I get frustrated, because I used to bring home about 500 bucks a week, which would pay for our lifestyle really easily, but I try not to get bitter.
Katie's getting paid weekly and the influx of cash is a legit godsend. Stand Alone Media is actually picking up business, but one of the people we've been working with has been killing us with how poorly he manages his time and directs his effort. He's resigned from everything from video editing and business partnership to pressing the button and waiting for videos to convert from VHS to a DVD-friendly format. I could go on and on, suffice to say we didn't even need to fire him since he's quit because pressing the button is too strenuous for him.
He's got the video conversion rig, though, so until we get our own (and it's not that pricey to make it work on our machines), we'll be borrowing his equipment. The video conversion and upscaling is just too lucrative for the investment to pass up, and we have clients backed up waiting for us to get started for them. It's not, by itself, enough to justify a full time gig but it's several extra hundred dollars per month and that's basically huge for us.
So, I hope to get Chapters 2 and 3 done today on the WIR (if you're interested in that, make a little noise on the posts to make me feel loved). My Hunter: the Reckoning book is shipping, so there's a chance it'll make it here today (but probably not before I head out for work - boo). I really love POD, guys, and I'm going to DriveThruRPG to buy these books instead of Amazon, because re-printing formerly out of print books is something I want to support financially. I'm at the last dungeon in Persona 1, and when I finish it, you'll probably get my final thoughts on the matter for a gameline I've loved for over a decade.
I should, depending on how busy it gets, be finishing pick training today. That means I get to be bossed around on a pick as I (too slowly) grab orders for increasingly impatient customers who want their bedroom sets for a .25 an hour raise. The actual best case scenario is me getting trained up on weekdays to familiarize myself with where products go in the warehouse racks so I'll actually probably be busy during the weekdays. That'll put my wage up to a hefty 9.75 per hour. Sometimes I get frustrated, because I used to bring home about 500 bucks a week, which would pay for our lifestyle really easily, but I try not to get bitter.
Katie's getting paid weekly and the influx of cash is a legit godsend. Stand Alone Media is actually picking up business, but one of the people we've been working with has been killing us with how poorly he manages his time and directs his effort. He's resigned from everything from video editing and business partnership to pressing the button and waiting for videos to convert from VHS to a DVD-friendly format. I could go on and on, suffice to say we didn't even need to fire him since he's quit because pressing the button is too strenuous for him.
He's got the video conversion rig, though, so until we get our own (and it's not that pricey to make it work on our machines), we'll be borrowing his equipment. The video conversion and upscaling is just too lucrative for the investment to pass up, and we have clients backed up waiting for us to get started for them. It's not, by itself, enough to justify a full time gig but it's several extra hundred dollars per month and that's basically huge for us.
So, I hope to get Chapters 2 and 3 done today on the WIR (if you're interested in that, make a little noise on the posts to make me feel loved). My Hunter: the Reckoning book is shipping, so there's a chance it'll make it here today (but probably not before I head out for work - boo). I really love POD, guys, and I'm going to DriveThruRPG to buy these books instead of Amazon, because re-printing formerly out of print books is something I want to support financially. I'm at the last dungeon in Persona 1, and when I finish it, you'll probably get my final thoughts on the matter for a gameline I've loved for over a decade.
It's the first time in quite a while I've posted twice in one day, even if the first time was public service announcement. I've been trying to clean up a lot of online profiles, do backups and virus checks, and keep all of my shit in order. My computer and online process is a lot like my physical processes, in that I'd rather be free of something than keep clutter around that I don't need, so I sometimes get overzealous. I've been tracking down personal possessions and trying to find places for a lot of them - the rest we're getting rid of - but in the process we discovered that there's a huge number of CD cases without disks and a fair number of CDs without cases anywhere to be found.
So, of course, we search for them. I won't be surprised if a lot of crap gets thrown out, though. Probably just CD case liners, using the cases themselves for burnt CDs when needed until they're all used up.
Katie's doing first-day stuff at the grocery store. The bank job, if offered, won't start until September so it's worthwhile to accept the work at minimum wage for the time being.
I need to get to the library in the days ahead, but I'm taking notes on the counter culture text. It had a series of essays, as I mentioned, on various bits from how technocratic government systems caused chafing with the youth of the day, the use (or, more appropriately, co-opting) of 'Eastern' religion, the use and abuse of psychedelics, and in at least one terribly misguided instance, why science kind of blows. I'm being a bit uncharitable, but just a bit.
They're all nominally useful, and I think I can use most of the information in a tangential way. I'm waiting until my notes are better to say much more, it's just that my thoughts are resting on them. Because I haven't made it out to get the book (haven't found our gift card and haven't made it to the library), I haven't started Gaiman even though I said I was going to. Instead, I've begun Slaughterhouse-Five. I wasn't nuts about the last Vonnegut I read, but I remember I liked Mother Night, so I'm not exactly holding a grudge. I'm not automatically excited about Vonnegut; his sound feels a little forced, but it's a littler different from what I see in a lot of books so I'm somewhat willing to accept that. The book's not long, so it's not like it'll put me out too much.
So, of course, we search for them. I won't be surprised if a lot of crap gets thrown out, though. Probably just CD case liners, using the cases themselves for burnt CDs when needed until they're all used up.
Katie's doing first-day stuff at the grocery store. The bank job, if offered, won't start until September so it's worthwhile to accept the work at minimum wage for the time being.
I need to get to the library in the days ahead, but I'm taking notes on the counter culture text. It had a series of essays, as I mentioned, on various bits from how technocratic government systems caused chafing with the youth of the day, the use (or, more appropriately, co-opting) of 'Eastern' religion, the use and abuse of psychedelics, and in at least one terribly misguided instance, why science kind of blows. I'm being a bit uncharitable, but just a bit.
They're all nominally useful, and I think I can use most of the information in a tangential way. I'm waiting until my notes are better to say much more, it's just that my thoughts are resting on them. Because I haven't made it out to get the book (haven't found our gift card and haven't made it to the library), I haven't started Gaiman even though I said I was going to. Instead, I've begun Slaughterhouse-Five. I wasn't nuts about the last Vonnegut I read, but I remember I liked Mother Night, so I'm not exactly holding a grudge. I'm not automatically excited about Vonnegut; his sound feels a little forced, but it's a littler different from what I see in a lot of books so I'm somewhat willing to accept that. The book's not long, so it's not like it'll put me out too much.
Tags:
Just a quick update to help me focus on what I'm doing today and this weeks highlights.
Last week was terrible. Everything on the news was bad and I had a hard time personally. I'm just working on moving forward and not getting fixated on shit I can't do anything about. Cantown was a success, Katie had fun at the convention, and Katie's currently going in for the job interview at US Bank for a position whose job description is basically "help people stop from getting foreclosed on", which pays something like 32k a year. I finished the books I was reading, but I didn't realize the library closed early on Mondays (of all days), so I'm a day late and I'm going to renew one to take notes with and turn in the other. I also finished my 6 books for the summer reading club, which means I'm entered 6 times for a drawing for 50 bucks, I guess? My next books are Gaiman's "Ocean at the End of the Lane" which promises to be fairly quick and Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse 5" which I have actually never read.
So, good.
I'm going to do the WIR for a combination of the WoD Core and "God-Machine" because it was asked of me and because I want to. I'm compulsive, so I feel the need to start from core before I get into Mage and Changeling which are the only two core books I actually own physically for WoD. There was a point when I felt the deal gained from buying pdf won out and it's fine for tablet readers, but because I want them on my bookshelf, I might eventually break down and buy them.
Other potential purchases include Dark Ages Vampire, Vampire: the Masquerade (1st Ed or Revised, I don't know), and Hunter : the Reckoning. Ostensibly for collection purposes, but also because I like reading them. Vampire: the Requiem might be a better game, but I don't actually know. I was never huge into Vampire, and I'm just now thinking of giving it a chance.
I found some notes for nWoD Exalted, so I'm going to take enter them onto the computer and try to tidy up my living situation which is getting better but, really, our house still looks like a huge wreck.
Last week was terrible. Everything on the news was bad and I had a hard time personally. I'm just working on moving forward and not getting fixated on shit I can't do anything about. Cantown was a success, Katie had fun at the convention, and Katie's currently going in for the job interview at US Bank for a position whose job description is basically "help people stop from getting foreclosed on", which pays something like 32k a year. I finished the books I was reading, but I didn't realize the library closed early on Mondays (of all days), so I'm a day late and I'm going to renew one to take notes with and turn in the other. I also finished my 6 books for the summer reading club, which means I'm entered 6 times for a drawing for 50 bucks, I guess? My next books are Gaiman's "Ocean at the End of the Lane" which promises to be fairly quick and Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse 5" which I have actually never read.
So, good.
I'm going to do the WIR for a combination of the WoD Core and "God-Machine" because it was asked of me and because I want to. I'm compulsive, so I feel the need to start from core before I get into Mage and Changeling which are the only two core books I actually own physically for WoD. There was a point when I felt the deal gained from buying pdf won out and it's fine for tablet readers, but because I want them on my bookshelf, I might eventually break down and buy them.
Other potential purchases include Dark Ages Vampire, Vampire: the Masquerade (1st Ed or Revised, I don't know), and Hunter : the Reckoning. Ostensibly for collection purposes, but also because I like reading them. Vampire: the Requiem might be a better game, but I don't actually know. I was never huge into Vampire, and I'm just now thinking of giving it a chance.
I found some notes for nWoD Exalted, so I'm going to take enter them onto the computer and try to tidy up my living situation which is getting better but, really, our house still looks like a huge wreck.
The book I'm reading right now is called "The Making of a Counter Culture : Reflections on the Technocratic Society and Its Youthful Opposition" by Theodore Roszak. Initially published in 1968, I'm reading a revised volume for a pretty specific purpose. My initial thoughts were to read something about the formation of counter cultures prior to 1980, or when cyberpunk took off. The book's a series of essays, going in fairly different directions, so it's not worth it to me right now to do any kind of summary, but I guess what I'll say for now is that it's marginally helpful in terms of thinking about my original goal (cyberpunk) and more interesting as a broad spectrum discussion of counter culture formations in the early 70's. I mean, it's due back to the library in 10 days, so I probably need to wrap it up, though.
Kay did get a job, by the way, just not the one we were thinking about before. The sure-thing is a minimum wage position as a stocker at the grocery store, which Katie was primarily interested in because it's not sedentary. Katie's interviewing for another position at US Bank on Tuesday, though, and that's kind of the one we're hoping for because it pays a real, living wage. We're literally down to our last couple of bucks (I get paid today, so I'm not immediately concerned), but if we didn't have this good news coming down the pipe, we'd be really incredibly stressed. As it is, we're just regular poor person stressed.
So, there's this game that's just called A Dark Room. If you google it, it comes right up; you don't have to download it. You just go to the page and you're already playing. It's delightfully simple to start playing and surprisingly soothing, while being just a little bit creepy. It reminds me of the old Commodore 64 games I played when I was younger (I'm really dating myself, here), like a cross between Wasteland and Roguelike map adventures.
The premise is really simple. You're in a dark room with a dying fire, and as you stoke it two things happen - a helpful stranger comes in from the cold and you realize you're out of wood. What follows is basically a tutorial; you quickly learn to build traps for game and expand your reach with the assistance of your new friend before striking out into a dying, post-apocalyptic world. There's a fun twist at the end, as well.
The writing is terse and moody, adding to what I would call a surprisingly well-created atmosphere. The game itself is quite short and saves automatically, though if you clear you cache, you'll have to begin again.
Games like A Dark Room add to the ever-growing list of games that are probably a little too small even to be considered 'indie'. Many are created by individuals using very basic tools bent to the ends of creating simple but atmospheric games which are short, but surprisingly sophisticated in their taste. Games like ".flow" are pretty representative of this, and are almost always free. (Some end up being a few dollars, at most.) They come at a time when huge games on expensive consoles are more entrenched in our cultural dialogue then ever. To me, it's almost like an act of rebellious creative expression that these games have come out. In the past, games were created by individuals and very small teams because the gaming industry was amazingly tiny. They were low-fi, but their expression was based on those individuals. This is an interesting return to that gaming ethos. I'm not saying that people should hang up their consoles and gaming rigs, but I would definitely give these games some time.
Edit : Also, I'm tempted to have someone print and bind my copy of God Machine updates. I hate reading pdfs, which is the only reason I haven't gotten to it besides an incredibly superficial overview. I'll either be talking about counter culture essays or doing the WIR thing pretty soon, I just haven't picked a book.
Kay did get a job, by the way, just not the one we were thinking about before. The sure-thing is a minimum wage position as a stocker at the grocery store, which Katie was primarily interested in because it's not sedentary. Katie's interviewing for another position at US Bank on Tuesday, though, and that's kind of the one we're hoping for because it pays a real, living wage. We're literally down to our last couple of bucks (I get paid today, so I'm not immediately concerned), but if we didn't have this good news coming down the pipe, we'd be really incredibly stressed. As it is, we're just regular poor person stressed.
So, there's this game that's just called A Dark Room. If you google it, it comes right up; you don't have to download it. You just go to the page and you're already playing. It's delightfully simple to start playing and surprisingly soothing, while being just a little bit creepy. It reminds me of the old Commodore 64 games I played when I was younger (I'm really dating myself, here), like a cross between Wasteland and Roguelike map adventures.
The premise is really simple. You're in a dark room with a dying fire, and as you stoke it two things happen - a helpful stranger comes in from the cold and you realize you're out of wood. What follows is basically a tutorial; you quickly learn to build traps for game and expand your reach with the assistance of your new friend before striking out into a dying, post-apocalyptic world. There's a fun twist at the end, as well.
The writing is terse and moody, adding to what I would call a surprisingly well-created atmosphere. The game itself is quite short and saves automatically, though if you clear you cache, you'll have to begin again.
Games like A Dark Room add to the ever-growing list of games that are probably a little too small even to be considered 'indie'. Many are created by individuals using very basic tools bent to the ends of creating simple but atmospheric games which are short, but surprisingly sophisticated in their taste. Games like ".flow" are pretty representative of this, and are almost always free. (Some end up being a few dollars, at most.) They come at a time when huge games on expensive consoles are more entrenched in our cultural dialogue then ever. To me, it's almost like an act of rebellious creative expression that these games have come out. In the past, games were created by individuals and very small teams because the gaming industry was amazingly tiny. They were low-fi, but their expression was based on those individuals. This is an interesting return to that gaming ethos. I'm not saying that people should hang up their consoles and gaming rigs, but I would definitely give these games some time.
Edit : Also, I'm tempted to have someone print and bind my copy of God Machine updates. I hate reading pdfs, which is the only reason I haven't gotten to it besides an incredibly superficial overview. I'll either be talking about counter culture essays or doing the WIR thing pretty soon, I just haven't picked a book.
Tags:
- .flow,
- a dark room,
- essays,
- gaming,
- life,
- literature,
- work
I've haven't been working on a damn thing lately, unless you count wedding recovery and major event recovery as specific things you can do, as opposed to a mass of unspecified things I resolutely avoided. I'm told that what I was doing for about two weeks or so is similar to a vacation, the definition of which I understand in an abstract kind of way, but the specifics of which I'm much fuzzier on. As in, I worried a little less and spent money on things that were for me a few times, but I also continued to go in to work because if I don't, I actually get fired.
It wasn't even a stay-cation. In fact, there's really no -cation at all. Dereliction is more appropriate, but I read three books, Katie watched Supernatural, and I finally mowed the yard, so I assume that's good enough.
People gave us a lot of money. We were going to go on vacation until we realized that we actually need that money for liquor and home repairs, so we're not going anywhere but getting our drink on has become about two shelves classier. (Not top shelf classy, mind you. The Poor Guilt is strong within us.)
I always promise pictures, so let's see. Under the cut :
( Picture )
I guess it was also Geek Pride Day, so we put on these things so, like, Katie could do a thing. I was a little more ambivalent about it, but yeah, this is us at the St. Louis Botanical Gardens where we also had the ceremony.
So, I know there are still stories to tell and I've just gotten back on the path to working on personal projects, again. This whole fiasco took up a massive amount of time in our lives where we had to put everything on hold to the point where, objectively, some of the projects I'm interested in aren't really all that relevant to most people even providing I complete them. But, that's really bitching and moaning for another time. It's time to get back to working on original and derivative content again, and I'm glad for that, at least.
It wasn't even a stay-cation. In fact, there's really no -cation at all. Dereliction is more appropriate, but I read three books, Katie watched Supernatural, and I finally mowed the yard, so I assume that's good enough.
People gave us a lot of money. We were going to go on vacation until we realized that we actually need that money for liquor and home repairs, so we're not going anywhere but getting our drink on has become about two shelves classier. (Not top shelf classy, mind you. The Poor Guilt is strong within us.)
I always promise pictures, so let's see. Under the cut :
( Picture )
I guess it was also Geek Pride Day, so we put on these things so, like, Katie could do a thing. I was a little more ambivalent about it, but yeah, this is us at the St. Louis Botanical Gardens where we also had the ceremony.
So, I know there are still stories to tell and I've just gotten back on the path to working on personal projects, again. This whole fiasco took up a massive amount of time in our lives where we had to put everything on hold to the point where, objectively, some of the projects I'm interested in aren't really all that relevant to most people even providing I complete them. But, that's really bitching and moaning for another time. It's time to get back to working on original and derivative content again, and I'm glad for that, at least.
Tags:
I'm trying to approach this from a number of angles, so bear with me. Like with many big events in life, during the moments they happen, they can seem overwhelming. In time, though, even the biggest events become foggy and insubstantial, like dreams after waking. Not to get too philosophical, or anything, that's just the way life is. The here and now is bright and vivid while the past is ever the providence of memory.
So, whatever.
Here's the overview; Katie and I had our ceremony at the Botanical Gardens and we had our reception at the Moonrise Hotel in the Delmar Loop in UCity. Technically, we'd been married for literally, exactly one year at that point since we'd gotten married on the 25th of May in the Belleville courthouse in 2012. I think how much that matters really depends on the person, but this is when we got to celebrate the occasion and one year seems pretty much as good a milestone as any. I think that 1 year is supposed to be the paper anniversary, but instead we threw a modest party. Ahem.
One of the things we've been saying over and over again, as a mantra to ourselves and others, to justify spending this kind of money (regardless of the source) is that there's no way we'd be having a celebration like this unless someone else wanted it enough to pay for it. Neither Katie nor I can even come close to affording it, and my parents certainly can't either. It's really only through the intervention of Katie's parents that we could manage it, but ironically, they were also our greatest stumbling block to pulling it off without too many issues. They would frequently green-light an expense after a conversation and balk when the bill came due, and that left both of us in a constant state of queasy nervousness as we slowly got too far in to pull the plug in any kind of reasonable way.
I tapped some of my best friends to join us in the wedding party, as did Katie. We briefed them, at one point, in person and over Skype (since some where coming from quite far away to join us by car and plane) as to what our plans were, but we all knew that Kay was going to have a hard time, logistically, getting a bachelor party thrown for them and, since no information was coming down the pipe about one for me, either, we just opted to set a date for us to throw a party and if another one was thrown for either or both of us at some point by our friends then, well, so be it.
This didn't sit well with others, though we didn't discover that until quite late into the game and the way things unfolded was explosively dramatic, culminating in major issues before the rehearsal and forcing us to abandon a lot of our preparation for failed negotiations on my part. Past that, rehearsals went fairly well and we proceeded to the ceremony next day where some people literally had only made it into town just in time for the actual event.
When it decided to rain on our outdoor wedding from literally, exactly the time it was scheduled until literally, exactly the time it ended. We repositioned it, but the movement through a lot of people off and things went a little late and we had to track down parents, friends, and wedding party members.
We arrived at the reception 30 minutes late to discover the guests had already eaten every scrap of food already. Katie's parents had tried to skate by without a huge catering bill, but that ended up only being about 17 dollars a head, and it lasted only until we arrived. The guests enjoyed it, but Katie's dad was pretty dismayed. Kay's parents had their own plates brought up and were eating quite well while the rest of the wedding guests were trying to determine if any more food was coming, forcing Kays father to go down and negotiate the price on sending more food up to hungry wedding guests while the wedding party was trying to determine if we should all just file out and hit up the Church's Chicken across the street. Funny story - I actually did not get to eat dinner. Someone found some bits of food in the kitchen for Kay and I, but we refused to eat in front of our guests and the wedding party, so we distributed them among our friends until new food arrived.
After that, the reception went fine. There was a lot of dancing and music until the party ran down at 11 - most of the guests had abandoned the field at that point, and we were left with a few of the wedding party and one or two other guests. Everyone says they had a really great time, so, as you know if you're in the center of a storm like that it seems much more hectic while, to others, it seems fun and somewhat effortless. Because the guests got to eat first, they didn't really notice that the food was a major issue and even though I didn't get to hit the open bar, it sounds like everyone else did, so it was a pretty good success for the majority of the people!
Some of the wedding party bought us champaign during the reception and afterwards we went to the rooftop bar to drink with our friends, our videographer and our DJ, where we had some more champaign and a little beer. After that wore down, it was terribly late, but Kay and I got into the hot tub in our room(!), ordered three Schlafly beers (Kolsh and Pale Ale) and white bean hummus with pita chips on the room tab, while some friends had been so kind as to smuggle some mackerel nigiri from a local sushi place in for us. We tiredly consumed this bounty and happily sipped beers until we decided that 3 AM was too late to be alive anymore and hit the sack.
The Moonrise is already a wonderful place to stay, but the suite we stayed in surprised us one last time when we turned out the lights and discovered that, hidden in the light, the ceiling had been decorated with luminescent paint in the shape of stars and the Milky Way band in a cloudless night sky. The next time we got to eat was the morning, which came far too soon. Katie woke up at 7 and I at 9 when we ate, bedraggled, at their excellent restaurant on the first floor with the remains of our wedding party - including one member who had been in such a state that we were able to actually make use of the drunk tank room we had booked.
There, that's the overview. Even in brief, it's long! The specific stories may be of interest as I find time to jot them down, here, though.
So, whatever.
Here's the overview; Katie and I had our ceremony at the Botanical Gardens and we had our reception at the Moonrise Hotel in the Delmar Loop in UCity. Technically, we'd been married for literally, exactly one year at that point since we'd gotten married on the 25th of May in the Belleville courthouse in 2012. I think how much that matters really depends on the person, but this is when we got to celebrate the occasion and one year seems pretty much as good a milestone as any. I think that 1 year is supposed to be the paper anniversary, but instead we threw a modest party. Ahem.
One of the things we've been saying over and over again, as a mantra to ourselves and others, to justify spending this kind of money (regardless of the source) is that there's no way we'd be having a celebration like this unless someone else wanted it enough to pay for it. Neither Katie nor I can even come close to affording it, and my parents certainly can't either. It's really only through the intervention of Katie's parents that we could manage it, but ironically, they were also our greatest stumbling block to pulling it off without too many issues. They would frequently green-light an expense after a conversation and balk when the bill came due, and that left both of us in a constant state of queasy nervousness as we slowly got too far in to pull the plug in any kind of reasonable way.
I tapped some of my best friends to join us in the wedding party, as did Katie. We briefed them, at one point, in person and over Skype (since some where coming from quite far away to join us by car and plane) as to what our plans were, but we all knew that Kay was going to have a hard time, logistically, getting a bachelor party thrown for them and, since no information was coming down the pipe about one for me, either, we just opted to set a date for us to throw a party and if another one was thrown for either or both of us at some point by our friends then, well, so be it.
This didn't sit well with others, though we didn't discover that until quite late into the game and the way things unfolded was explosively dramatic, culminating in major issues before the rehearsal and forcing us to abandon a lot of our preparation for failed negotiations on my part. Past that, rehearsals went fairly well and we proceeded to the ceremony next day where some people literally had only made it into town just in time for the actual event.
When it decided to rain on our outdoor wedding from literally, exactly the time it was scheduled until literally, exactly the time it ended. We repositioned it, but the movement through a lot of people off and things went a little late and we had to track down parents, friends, and wedding party members.
We arrived at the reception 30 minutes late to discover the guests had already eaten every scrap of food already. Katie's parents had tried to skate by without a huge catering bill, but that ended up only being about 17 dollars a head, and it lasted only until we arrived. The guests enjoyed it, but Katie's dad was pretty dismayed. Kay's parents had their own plates brought up and were eating quite well while the rest of the wedding guests were trying to determine if any more food was coming, forcing Kays father to go down and negotiate the price on sending more food up to hungry wedding guests while the wedding party was trying to determine if we should all just file out and hit up the Church's Chicken across the street. Funny story - I actually did not get to eat dinner. Someone found some bits of food in the kitchen for Kay and I, but we refused to eat in front of our guests and the wedding party, so we distributed them among our friends until new food arrived.
After that, the reception went fine. There was a lot of dancing and music until the party ran down at 11 - most of the guests had abandoned the field at that point, and we were left with a few of the wedding party and one or two other guests. Everyone says they had a really great time, so, as you know if you're in the center of a storm like that it seems much more hectic while, to others, it seems fun and somewhat effortless. Because the guests got to eat first, they didn't really notice that the food was a major issue and even though I didn't get to hit the open bar, it sounds like everyone else did, so it was a pretty good success for the majority of the people!
Some of the wedding party bought us champaign during the reception and afterwards we went to the rooftop bar to drink with our friends, our videographer and our DJ, where we had some more champaign and a little beer. After that wore down, it was terribly late, but Kay and I got into the hot tub in our room(!), ordered three Schlafly beers (Kolsh and Pale Ale) and white bean hummus with pita chips on the room tab, while some friends had been so kind as to smuggle some mackerel nigiri from a local sushi place in for us. We tiredly consumed this bounty and happily sipped beers until we decided that 3 AM was too late to be alive anymore and hit the sack.
The Moonrise is already a wonderful place to stay, but the suite we stayed in surprised us one last time when we turned out the lights and discovered that, hidden in the light, the ceiling had been decorated with luminescent paint in the shape of stars and the Milky Way band in a cloudless night sky. The next time we got to eat was the morning, which came far too soon. Katie woke up at 7 and I at 9 when we ate, bedraggled, at their excellent restaurant on the first floor with the remains of our wedding party - including one member who had been in such a state that we were able to actually make use of the drunk tank room we had booked.
There, that's the overview. Even in brief, it's long! The specific stories may be of interest as I find time to jot them down, here, though.
I have mere minutes as I wait to shower but here's an update, I suppose.
I finished Cat's Cradle, and I'm not really that enthusiastic about it, to be quite honest with you. It seemed a little smug and shallow to me, where most of the book reads as something of a shaggy dog story. None of the characters actually did anything, and I know that's part of the theme, but I don't think it was particularly great. The technique was sound enough, and Vonnegut is clever enough with words and ideas, so it was easy enough to finish, though. One of those times where I actually feel like the book is less than the sum of its parts.
Still slogging through the programming manual - I haven't really had enough time to sit down and work at coding, so the reading and interaction with it is probably going to stretch past the wedding date. I picked up the paperback version of Wraith : the Oblivion which, after all this time, I realize has a very decent (if physically difficult to read) introduction. The book club is on to Murakami's Kafka on the Shore, which I've read before, but liked quite a bit at the time. I'm also currently about halfway through What if the Earth Had Two Moons - a pop-science astronomy book about the physical formation of earth-like planets in space under different construction scenarios.
The house is an incredible mess. We've pulled many books and DVDs off the shelves, along with a CRT television, so that they sit on the floor awaiting their pickup. I had a chair break right out from under me, and it's quietly awaiting demolition on our living room floor, to mine and Katie's consternation. Yesterday, being particularly busy, we did not have time to deal with events quite like we would have wished. Wedding-related stress from my in-laws is driving both Katie and I to heavier drinking, but my suit recently came in and things are coming together very nicely. If I have time, perhaps on Monday I will take some pictures. I occasionally promise things like this, regardless of intent to follow through.
I finished Cat's Cradle, and I'm not really that enthusiastic about it, to be quite honest with you. It seemed a little smug and shallow to me, where most of the book reads as something of a shaggy dog story. None of the characters actually did anything, and I know that's part of the theme, but I don't think it was particularly great. The technique was sound enough, and Vonnegut is clever enough with words and ideas, so it was easy enough to finish, though. One of those times where I actually feel like the book is less than the sum of its parts.
Still slogging through the programming manual - I haven't really had enough time to sit down and work at coding, so the reading and interaction with it is probably going to stretch past the wedding date. I picked up the paperback version of Wraith : the Oblivion which, after all this time, I realize has a very decent (if physically difficult to read) introduction. The book club is on to Murakami's Kafka on the Shore, which I've read before, but liked quite a bit at the time. I'm also currently about halfway through What if the Earth Had Two Moons - a pop-science astronomy book about the physical formation of earth-like planets in space under different construction scenarios.
The house is an incredible mess. We've pulled many books and DVDs off the shelves, along with a CRT television, so that they sit on the floor awaiting their pickup. I had a chair break right out from under me, and it's quietly awaiting demolition on our living room floor, to mine and Katie's consternation. Yesterday, being particularly busy, we did not have time to deal with events quite like we would have wished. Wedding-related stress from my in-laws is driving both Katie and I to heavier drinking, but my suit recently came in and things are coming together very nicely. If I have time, perhaps on Monday I will take some pictures. I occasionally promise things like this, regardless of intent to follow through.
Tags:
- books,
- life,
- literature,
- stress,
- wedding
Books read so far this week are a little odd. I finished "The Man Who Invented Hitler", an odd book Katie had bought some time ago about the therapist who might have, sorta, kind of caused the mental leap from timid-but-weird Hitler to flip-out-and-murder Hitler. I don't know that I agree with the premise, but there was a lot of interesting historical what-have-you in it. I read a cookbook called "Korean Cooking for Everyone", which I've often flipped through and learned a good way to press tofu before frying. It was worth it if only for that.
I joined a book club started by a friend of Katie's, and the first book is "Cat's Cradle" by Vonnegut. I haven't read it yet, but I'm about 50 pages in and I've found it to be intriguing. Since it's for a discussion group, I'm taking notes and hopefully I'll be finished by Wednesday. I'm also reading "Starting Out With C++", which was not the book I was using for my own studies in high school or college (my mother stole my programming book, but to what end I will never understand), so I figured there was little use in reading it without learning to code again. I went out and downloaded a free compiler that Katie's used in the past, but that'll probably take some time to properly work through.
Next month is Murakami's "Kafka on the Shore". The library in Belleville didn't have "Cat's Cradle", so Katie just bought it for the Kindle app, which I don't enjoy as much but, well, I don't have time to waste waiting for the library to get it in before the end of the month and it was only 3 bucks this way. I own "Kafka", already, which is something like cheating but, well, I didn't vote for it so those are the rules of the club. Majority wins.
Michel Pollen just released a new book called "Cooked" and, I swear to god, the only reason I asked the library to order it for me is because it bases its chapters off of the classical western elements in terms of its discussion on food preparation and it gave me an idea for Dragon Blooded cooking Charms. I've liked Pollen's other stuff, though, so I'm excited to read it on general terms.
Work is normal, the convention is over, my tire is fixed, my suit is in, Katie's suit is being hand-tailored and I'm totally gonna get shown up in terms of awesome suit quality (I'm excited to see what comes in!), but mine is still fairly nice. Our food raising charity, Can Town St Louis raised over 300 dollars in cash from our auction and over 250 in the value for canned goods, so this month ended up being about 600 in cash and value to the Collinsville area food pantry. We're practically ecstatic - I think this is a new record, and I'm amazingly proud of not just Katie, but everyone who donated and helped with the events.
I'm going to be selling or giving away a fair amount of my own book collection - both role-playing and otherwise. I'll post a list when I know what I'm getting rid of. It's not that I don't like it, but we're desperately trying to cut back on our possessions in order to tidy up our material lives, here. Books and media are my greatest weakness, and I'm trying to set a good example and get better about possessions and collecting, myself. It's good stuff, though, most of it. You might want some.
We're very busy; that's not everything, just a snap-shot. Money is very tight, but we're feeling pretty good in between bits of financial-based anxiety. Cheers!
ASTL was pretty good even though I was only really there for about half of it.
Some sketchy ass dude who started showing up to our Cantown charity events offered to pay us a little more than half the room cost to sleep in the room we rented for our camera dudes, and after everyone okay'd it, it was set up. We didn't know him real well and he kind of made me uneasy in a way I couldn't really peg, but he wasn't frothing at the mouth or anything and we're pretty tight on cash.
So, this dude, who's name is Alex C. Shields, starts showing up all the damned time. He walks his ass into our room at weird times, he's touching up on people, leaving shit in our room, and basically getting way too fucking personal. At the time, we all just kind of figured his awkward nerd-self was just tone-deaf, but in retrospect it's pretty much stone-basic PUA bullshit. It came to a surprising head when several of us went to breakfast in the morning - Katie, myself, and a few friends. One of them was this 17-year old kid who'd been going to Cantown for a while and had been ditched by his friends - we knew him pretty well, so we're all just sitting at breakfast eating eggs, drinking coffee, and all that tired Sunday morning breakfast whatever when Alex moseys up and sits his ass down without so much of a how-do-you-fucking-do.
And starts poking the 17 year old in the arm.
Listen, you shit, no touching. You're 30, you're squinty-ass eyes look like a hungry weasels', and, quite honestly, you've been sticking your dick in our business from the word 'go'. I didn't say that, though. No. I'm a lot classier and I don't want to start a fucking row while I'm trying to enjoy my bacon. I just said, "No touching!" Dude jumped a little, then starting poking the air right by the kid again just like a shitty 8 year old in the back of the car trying to piss off his sister. "Just stop it, man. We're at breakfast. No touching."
And he stops. I mean, he doesn't stop butting into our conversations at awkward times and making shitty jokes, but at least he's not rubbing on people anymore. Just trust me that the touching wasn't wanted, okay? There's a whole thing about this, and trying to go over it makes just makes me think of the snake trying to swallow a cow. Even if you can do it, you're going to be more miserable than when you started, so I'm just not. So, trust me on this. If you want to know, I'll tell you later.
We get up to our rooms, and he follows us. I remember Katie and I talking about how frustrating and weird that he keeps leaving shit in our room - some of it's innocuous, like a bottle of liquor or a bag of chips, but some of it's pretty bizarre and pretty large. Like a strung compound bow and a tactical vest. Dude came by at, like, 2 AM with two girls on his arms from the rave last evening looking for his fucking cellphone charger then just fucked off without taking anything back last time we talked to him before breakfast, so I'm just like, "While we're here, you've got a lot of shit in our rooms you should probably take out." Because it's Sunday. Checkout for him is noon and it's 10, so. You know. Fuck off.
He makes puppy dog eyes, like, "But.... there's not that much stuff in there." to which we reply that it honestly doesn't matter if it's a half-eaten Hostess cupcake and a bottle of lube, it's gotta go. So he mutters about getting a cart for his stuff and trundles off. I grab as much stuff as seems relevant - Katie has to stay for the whole day to film Sunday wrap-up, and I head out for home since I've got to take care of the pets and then I've got work in the evening. I go down to get in my car and, far from bringing a cart up, I see this dude just gangster-driving right next to me, staring me down as I'm getting into my car.
Whatever.
Let me tell you, Sunday was a fucking beautiful day. I'm listening to my stupid ass rpg character themed soundtrack and pull into my driveway just as Sinatra's take on "The Girl From Ipanema" wraps up. I mean, it's even the last track on the CD. That's pretty much perfect. Except that there's a hissing sound that I'm fairly sure isn't part of the soundtrack. The fact that it's continuing despite the car being totally off confirms it. My tire's leaking.
This - I assume - is just bad luck. By which I mean that it's bad luck of the same stripe that caused one of my cars to simultaneously fall apart at the axle and had the hoses on the radiator burst at the same time, or the bad luck that causes me to be laid off right after my contract is renewed, or one of the many other extensively varied flavors of terrible fortunes I have demonstrated over the years. But no. While the luck is certainly bad, this is not the wear-and-tear brand of terrible luck that's as frustrating as it is held to be blatantly inevitable by the deterioration or order into uniform chaos that is thermodynamics at the personal level, but rather a specific brand of formulated malice that you tend to expect from 4 year olds that haven't developed a superego and man-children 30-year old sociopaths that fancy minors.
I finally get ahold of Katie and secure a ride, but in the meantime, I want to know what the hell is causing my tire to deflate. There's a half-inch wide piece of metal sticking about a quarter-inch out of the tire near the groove of the rain treads. I get some pliers to wrench this fucker out, but it doesn't wanna go so I just keep pulling and pulling. Finally, I get the whole thing - it's one prong of a safety scissors blade. That's 2.5 inches of safety blade that had been neatly clipped from the whole scissor right where the bold creating the fulcrum had used to be - which is to say that it is a manufactured spike. Which is to say that my tired had been spiked.
tl:dr, a pedophile spiked my car tire. I don't have solid proof, but I am sitting on a pile of circumstantial evidence, for all the good it does me.
But if you're sitting there, very reasonably, thinking "But just getting a little too friendly with a kid isn't that bad."
http://elendraug.tumblr.com/post/48162702708/schlongstick-elendraug-horriblycrazy
Just, like, check it out. I'll wait.
The con staff are taking it pretty seriously, but the information didn't really come out until the whole thing was over. Since nothing got reported while the con was going, there's not all that much they can do. He's also a registered sex offender for violently accosting a 14 year old, but that's apparently old news. I gotta see if my insurance will take care of the tire tomorrow, and Katie's getting statements to file a report with the police. It's a lot worse than what I saw; it looks like we had a real, genuine creeper on our hands. I'm going to go have a drink, now.
There's really nothing like constantly hearing that the one thing you want to do with your life is a fake, dangerously stupid pipe-dream.
Tags:
I'm not sure if a calendar of what I'm planning is relevant to anyone, except in the way that anything I post here is (which is, it's not, but I'm very kindly indulged in my habits) but here's what I'm up to.
I sporadically mention I run a WoD game, and I run it even less than I mention it, but the next session is on Monday. I feel pretty confident in my writing and running abilities now, but I'm also pretty aware of how differently I run then the rest of my friends. I initially planned on 13 whole sessions, but it'll probably end up around 10 unless Katie wants more after the wrap-up and there's an easily extendible game. Running these sessions has been good for me, and even though I've been too slow on the write up for them (life's been weird, but I can't use that as an excuse really), I think I've been getting better.
The ceremony is next month on the 25th, and that's been taking up a huge amount of my time between working, helping with convention events, and dealing with video and photo shoots and the occasional problems with Stand Alone. I'm not really going to be doing much besides helping finish the programming for the event and getting the finer details taken care of until 5/25, just because I don't want to juggle any more than we've already got.
Not this weekend, but next is a St. Louis area anime convention held in Collinsville, IL. Katie's doing the bulk of the work since it's for Stand Alone, but we do have a guest coming in from out of town, and I tend to work the bulk of the weekend. I'll be hoping to get Saturday off (which probably won't be hard, since we have people who want hours at work and can't get enough - usually including me), but that's one of two large events before the wedding. There's also editing to be done for the shooting and we lost our old editor and business partner due to the ravages of apathy, so that's all Katie. There's also a Can Town prom event between now and 5/25, which will probably eat most of the week before for Katie.
Between now and next month, I'll be doing research on the feasibility of going back to grad school. I know that several of you are really pushing for me to go back, and I couldn't agree more, but money is the primary consideration. I'll be looking primarily at schools in my area because we can't really leave. We've got a house that we're not really willing to sell with some pets who can't really be moved. After some discussion, we're probably willing to rent it if someone's willing to take care of the non-mobile animals, but that's an unusual deal. Personally, I'm not willing to confirm or deny a course of action until I know all the angles and have a backup plan, though. Prospects of employment or financing by graduate programs need to be looked into again, and I'm going to write another essay after next month. (This time is also for academic research, but I won't be turning the heat up on that for a while.) I've heard a lot of advice, but the primary thing I want to know about now is how to get people to actually write a letter of recommendation after being totally out of communication and academia for a lengthy period. I'm thinking that going back for individual classes might be the way to reintroduce myself to professors on campus, and to reintroduce myself back to university life and expectations. I'm very patient about this kind of thing, providing I'm actually making headway.
I sporadically mention I run a WoD game, and I run it even less than I mention it, but the next session is on Monday. I feel pretty confident in my writing and running abilities now, but I'm also pretty aware of how differently I run then the rest of my friends. I initially planned on 13 whole sessions, but it'll probably end up around 10 unless Katie wants more after the wrap-up and there's an easily extendible game. Running these sessions has been good for me, and even though I've been too slow on the write up for them (life's been weird, but I can't use that as an excuse really), I think I've been getting better.
The ceremony is next month on the 25th, and that's been taking up a huge amount of my time between working, helping with convention events, and dealing with video and photo shoots and the occasional problems with Stand Alone. I'm not really going to be doing much besides helping finish the programming for the event and getting the finer details taken care of until 5/25, just because I don't want to juggle any more than we've already got.
Not this weekend, but next is a St. Louis area anime convention held in Collinsville, IL. Katie's doing the bulk of the work since it's for Stand Alone, but we do have a guest coming in from out of town, and I tend to work the bulk of the weekend. I'll be hoping to get Saturday off (which probably won't be hard, since we have people who want hours at work and can't get enough - usually including me), but that's one of two large events before the wedding. There's also editing to be done for the shooting and we lost our old editor and business partner due to the ravages of apathy, so that's all Katie. There's also a Can Town prom event between now and 5/25, which will probably eat most of the week before for Katie.
Between now and next month, I'll be doing research on the feasibility of going back to grad school. I know that several of you are really pushing for me to go back, and I couldn't agree more, but money is the primary consideration. I'll be looking primarily at schools in my area because we can't really leave. We've got a house that we're not really willing to sell with some pets who can't really be moved. After some discussion, we're probably willing to rent it if someone's willing to take care of the non-mobile animals, but that's an unusual deal. Personally, I'm not willing to confirm or deny a course of action until I know all the angles and have a backup plan, though. Prospects of employment or financing by graduate programs need to be looked into again, and I'm going to write another essay after next month. (This time is also for academic research, but I won't be turning the heat up on that for a while.) I've heard a lot of advice, but the primary thing I want to know about now is how to get people to actually write a letter of recommendation after being totally out of communication and academia for a lengthy period. I'm thinking that going back for individual classes might be the way to reintroduce myself to professors on campus, and to reintroduce myself back to university life and expectations. I'm very patient about this kind of thing, providing I'm actually making headway.
Tags:
I'm not going to brag too much, but the one good thing about my job besides the paycheck is now I look surprisingly good without a shirt on. Like, I'm gonna look great for pool parties.
Tags:
I'm still doing all of the things I said I'd do, vis a vis my personal goals. I don't have anything exciting to report, but I am doing stuff, so that's my progress report.
I'm still playing fucking Dark Souls. I guess I'm pretty miserable at it, because I'm 91 hours in and I'm just starting on the boss fight circuit. This shit is wicked difficult, but I think I'm doing one of the hardest ones first. I don't spend all that much time playing video games, so despite the large number of banked hours, that's literally every hour I've spent playing video games since December 26th. Don't get me wrong, though - I like the game. It's still fun, and I'm still enjoying my time with it, but right now it's a little like the meal that tastes really good, but it's too large and you're trying to finish the dessert which you know won't age well in your refrigerator so if you don't finish it now, you probably never will.
That analogy is a little clunky, but I guess I'm not really going back to fix it.
I'm still reading Foucault's Pendulum. My alternate read has moved over to D&D 3.0's version of Manual of the Planes. Pendulum probably should be done by now, but it's about 500+ pages and it's not really tough, but it's a little dense. When I get back from work, though, I'm physically tired, and at about 10 PM, my eyes start to get pretty heavy. On my days off, I'm pretty busy. So, the window of time that I can get into it is pretty small; I forgot how easily a full time job saps your energy. But, it's interesting and I'm still working on it. I'll talk more about it when it's finished. MotP is also interesting, from a gaming standpoint, because I've never gotten to play a D&D game that seriously hits the planes, and I've wanted to ever since I checked out the old 1st Ed. Manual of the Planes book from my local library as a kid. It's dry as hell and, in a lot of ways, it's not as engrossing as that first book was all that time ago, but it's still an interesting read.
I'm going to the zoo today to enjoy a friends birthday, so I hope your day is okay, too.
I'm still playing fucking Dark Souls. I guess I'm pretty miserable at it, because I'm 91 hours in and I'm just starting on the boss fight circuit. This shit is wicked difficult, but I think I'm doing one of the hardest ones first. I don't spend all that much time playing video games, so despite the large number of banked hours, that's literally every hour I've spent playing video games since December 26th. Don't get me wrong, though - I like the game. It's still fun, and I'm still enjoying my time with it, but right now it's a little like the meal that tastes really good, but it's too large and you're trying to finish the dessert which you know won't age well in your refrigerator so if you don't finish it now, you probably never will.
That analogy is a little clunky, but I guess I'm not really going back to fix it.
I'm still reading Foucault's Pendulum. My alternate read has moved over to D&D 3.0's version of Manual of the Planes. Pendulum probably should be done by now, but it's about 500+ pages and it's not really tough, but it's a little dense. When I get back from work, though, I'm physically tired, and at about 10 PM, my eyes start to get pretty heavy. On my days off, I'm pretty busy. So, the window of time that I can get into it is pretty small; I forgot how easily a full time job saps your energy. But, it's interesting and I'm still working on it. I'll talk more about it when it's finished. MotP is also interesting, from a gaming standpoint, because I've never gotten to play a D&D game that seriously hits the planes, and I've wanted to ever since I checked out the old 1st Ed. Manual of the Planes book from my local library as a kid. It's dry as hell and, in a lot of ways, it's not as engrossing as that first book was all that time ago, but it's still an interesting read.
I'm going to the zoo today to enjoy a friends birthday, so I hope your day is okay, too.
Tags:
One of our friends from the Homestuck events Katie's been running turned 21, and I had to work (boo) in the evening, so I wasn't able to go. Kay was, though, and seemed to have a great time, and that's always pleasant. Since I'm pretty much toast after getting off work at 9 PM, and I've already done most of the stuff I expect to do in a day, I figured I'd stop by the store on the way home and picked up rail bourbon and soda. Most of my night was spent drinking bourbon highballs and listening to loud music, but there's always a little time to sneak on the internet and embarrass yourself a little bit. The temptation is difficult to resist!
So, the hangover's over even before noon works its way around due to good hydration, and I'm mostly just sitting around waiting for Kay to get back. My schedule for the next week is less demanding then the one leading up to Frank's wedding, but it still involves a gaming session sandwiched in between my two most demanding work days. (That would be Wednesday and Thursday, which are going to be even worse than usual. There's really no getting around it, since people are getting their tax returns in, there's a huge, several week long sales event, and incredibly heavy furniture is flying out of the store almost faster than we can truck it in.) I've come to grips with the fact that for as long as the sales event is going on, I'm gonna be physically wiped out. I can't stress enough, though, that it's better emotionally than being unemployed or even my last gig. Other Ops members in the warehouse assert strongly that there are head-games and stress aplenty, and I'm sure they're right, but I'm not sure if it's on the same level as what I was dealing with before.
I've been continuing my read through of everything we've got physically at the house. I'm still on Foucault's Pendulum, which has started to pick up. Eco is a talented writer, but the reading is much denser than a lot of other stuff I've picked up in the past. I had finished Guide to the Traditions (which just made me want a copy of Guide to the Technocracy to pair it with), and wasn't in the mood for more dense reading this morning with the hangover, so I picked up the dharma book for the Bone Flowers from KotE. KotE has always had issues with exoticism, and I think that a post-colonialist reading of the core game book and its splats would probably be really interesting, but we already know, in a broad way, the kinds of issues the line had. Stephen Lee Sheppard over at RPG.net has long espoused that the Bone Flowers book is rubbish and, while I did purchase and enjoy the Devil Tiger book at his prompting, I still like the Bone Flower book quite a lot.
I don't really know if it's worthwhile to really discuss the gaming books on here, but despite my pseudo hiatus (which is really more me being unconcerned about not posting than it is actively cutting back), I feel like I probably will - just somewhat sporadically.
So, the hangover's over even before noon works its way around due to good hydration, and I'm mostly just sitting around waiting for Kay to get back. My schedule for the next week is less demanding then the one leading up to Frank's wedding, but it still involves a gaming session sandwiched in between my two most demanding work days. (That would be Wednesday and Thursday, which are going to be even worse than usual. There's really no getting around it, since people are getting their tax returns in, there's a huge, several week long sales event, and incredibly heavy furniture is flying out of the store almost faster than we can truck it in.) I've come to grips with the fact that for as long as the sales event is going on, I'm gonna be physically wiped out. I can't stress enough, though, that it's better emotionally than being unemployed or even my last gig. Other Ops members in the warehouse assert strongly that there are head-games and stress aplenty, and I'm sure they're right, but I'm not sure if it's on the same level as what I was dealing with before.
I've been continuing my read through of everything we've got physically at the house. I'm still on Foucault's Pendulum, which has started to pick up. Eco is a talented writer, but the reading is much denser than a lot of other stuff I've picked up in the past. I had finished Guide to the Traditions (which just made me want a copy of Guide to the Technocracy to pair it with), and wasn't in the mood for more dense reading this morning with the hangover, so I picked up the dharma book for the Bone Flowers from KotE. KotE has always had issues with exoticism, and I think that a post-colonialist reading of the core game book and its splats would probably be really interesting, but we already know, in a broad way, the kinds of issues the line had. Stephen Lee Sheppard over at RPG.net has long espoused that the Bone Flowers book is rubbish and, while I did purchase and enjoy the Devil Tiger book at his prompting, I still like the Bone Flower book quite a lot.
I don't really know if it's worthwhile to really discuss the gaming books on here, but despite my pseudo hiatus (which is really more me being unconcerned about not posting than it is actively cutting back), I feel like I probably will - just somewhat sporadically.
Tags:
Work has been killing me dead physically and, as you're aware, the physical too often becomes mental. Katie and I have been having a lot of success in our day to day, which is exciting, even though the individual actions are quite mundane. Take it from me! But even though it's quite arduous, things are working pretty well, and I'm actually quite excited. We're starting the in-depth wedding ceremony and reception prep, being held at the Botanical Gardens in St. Louis and at the Moonrise Hotel in U. City at the Loop, respectively. We're not inviting a huge amount of people, but there should end up being a decent number - some, but not all, of the invitations have gone out. This kind of thing is a bit stressful.
Katie's parents are footing the bill for a large amount of this, considering we simply cannot. Initially, we were content to keep the festivities very small and quite humble, but while this is our deal, Kay's parents are fairly well aware that they're unlikely to get another opportunity to see a wedding event for their children, are were willing to pay in order to fund a more grandiose event. I have to admit that I was initially hesitant to accept such a large gesture, but weddings can be very important to people, and it's resulting in something I'm quite pleased with. The locations were surprisingly reasonable in their pricing, not being much worse at all than smaller or more humble locations. I don't say this often, but our fortune has been quite good in this endeavor.
Some of you are likely to receive invitations. If you don't, and you expected to or really want to attend, let me know - there is a possibility we dropped the ball and missed your card or we can accommodate you. I'm hedging a guess and assuming that everyone that can reasonably expect one is going to receive one (and people who don't might still get one), but I could easily be wrong on this one. As always, I don't intend any disrespect or snub to anyone.
As we knock out personal obligations and projects, we're trying not to take on any more, and working on prioritizing what we've got left.
Katie's parents are footing the bill for a large amount of this, considering we simply cannot. Initially, we were content to keep the festivities very small and quite humble, but while this is our deal, Kay's parents are fairly well aware that they're unlikely to get another opportunity to see a wedding event for their children, are were willing to pay in order to fund a more grandiose event. I have to admit that I was initially hesitant to accept such a large gesture, but weddings can be very important to people, and it's resulting in something I'm quite pleased with. The locations were surprisingly reasonable in their pricing, not being much worse at all than smaller or more humble locations. I don't say this often, but our fortune has been quite good in this endeavor.
Some of you are likely to receive invitations. If you don't, and you expected to or really want to attend, let me know - there is a possibility we dropped the ball and missed your card or we can accommodate you. I'm hedging a guess and assuming that everyone that can reasonably expect one is going to receive one (and people who don't might still get one), but I could easily be wrong on this one. As always, I don't intend any disrespect or snub to anyone.
As we knock out personal obligations and projects, we're trying not to take on any more, and working on prioritizing what we've got left.
January has been a good month for updating my journal online, which is ironic since I've been seriously considering if I should post less frequently and steer my efforts somewhere they're likely to advance my personal goals. Logically, it's probably true that updating a journal like this shouldn't really interfere with my ability to do more strenuous work but practically, every time I sit down to write, I use up what I kind of think of as 'effort points'. It takes effort for me to structure my thoughts in prose and try to say something worthwhile and when I'm done - whether I'm successful posting here or not - I usually don't feel like doubling down and redirecting that writing momentum into anything else for the moment.
So I've been updating here more, and writing other stuff less.
I haven't really been doing anything useful. Part of that is because I'm so dead broke, even paying my phone bill gets a little stressful; my first paycheck was basically for two days, so I'm at the most awkward part of the pay cycle. I started my job at the beginning of January, and I'm not getting a real paycheck until the very, very end, so I can't really do anything that involves the expenditure of resources. The other bit is that I've spent a lot of effort on stuff that doesn't matter at all. This journal, at least one bogus role-playing game, systematic mods that I'm passionate about but aren't even really useful for my own gaming sessions, and bits and pieces of pretend-academic writing are all pretty much bullshit.
Everything has a certain value, at least in consistently writing things and being accustomed to taking notes and getting thoughts together, but once you've been doing that for a while, wouldn't you agree that it's time to get your shit in order? There are things I want to work on, and all of it means that I'm either producing original work or working on real academic content, and the latter is just not likely right at the moment. If these are things I am really interested in doing, I have to work on doing them specifically. In large part, that means that I have to look very seriously at what my goals are and how to actually go about them, what goes into that kind of work, and so on.
I'm not going to delete the journal or even stop posting altogether. I don't know what this is going to turn into; it won't be largely different from what it is now, though. You'll find out just like I will, though.
So I've been updating here more, and writing other stuff less.
I haven't really been doing anything useful. Part of that is because I'm so dead broke, even paying my phone bill gets a little stressful; my first paycheck was basically for two days, so I'm at the most awkward part of the pay cycle. I started my job at the beginning of January, and I'm not getting a real paycheck until the very, very end, so I can't really do anything that involves the expenditure of resources. The other bit is that I've spent a lot of effort on stuff that doesn't matter at all. This journal, at least one bogus role-playing game, systematic mods that I'm passionate about but aren't even really useful for my own gaming sessions, and bits and pieces of pretend-academic writing are all pretty much bullshit.
Everything has a certain value, at least in consistently writing things and being accustomed to taking notes and getting thoughts together, but once you've been doing that for a while, wouldn't you agree that it's time to get your shit in order? There are things I want to work on, and all of it means that I'm either producing original work or working on real academic content, and the latter is just not likely right at the moment. If these are things I am really interested in doing, I have to work on doing them specifically. In large part, that means that I have to look very seriously at what my goals are and how to actually go about them, what goes into that kind of work, and so on.
I'm not going to delete the journal or even stop posting altogether. I don't know what this is going to turn into; it won't be largely different from what it is now, though. You'll find out just like I will, though.
Tags:
I've made my first two Lunar characters, ever, in any edition in the last few days - one who has a hermit crab spirit shape and another who's got a spider one. The first is a full moon geomancer, the second is a sorcerer no-moon. I've had a lot of conceptual issues with how Lunars were done in 1st and 2nd Ed. and I've got some mechanical issues that have bugged me when I was writing the characters up, but I worked with what the system gave me, and it was fun.
I've got an idea for an old-school D&D or Pathfinder game, inspired by Dark Souls. I had an idea for a Changeling character based on the protagonist, too. I haven't done anything with this, and it's likely that I'll make a character roughly based on the protagonist's concept, but I've got too much other stuff on the table to dick around with this too much.
My rough plan to read every book in the house as a means of passing the time in a somewhat more interesting way than refreshing Tumblr all day has hit a little snag. I started Focault's Pendulum, which is interesting but dense. I cracked open my copy of Guide to the Traditions as a way of interesting, lighter fare, but forgot that it reads like a fairly interesting textbook. I didn't exactly feel like starting a third book, so I'm just working my way through those two, and damn the time. I'd better get used to it if I want to get through Being and Nothingness.
I found my nWoD notes, so the next game is in prep. The game is very much like a book you start and found interesting, but the momentum never really builds up. I'm the kind of guy who likes going to and playing role-playing sessions, but the time commitment means that the only way I get out there is peer pressure. Running the game just makes that worse, so it's something of a life lesson. I'm determined, though.
Pathfinder is on for the 30th. It's a rough time slot for me, because it's Wednesday evening. Thursday morning is truck day, and the game's likely to let out at 11 PM, which means I'm in bed at midnight and up by 7-7:30. There's nothing really wrong with that, but I don't really thrive on that kind of schedule. It's the best that can be done, though, so I respect that call.
I've got an idea for an old-school D&D or Pathfinder game, inspired by Dark Souls. I had an idea for a Changeling character based on the protagonist, too. I haven't done anything with this, and it's likely that I'll make a character roughly based on the protagonist's concept, but I've got too much other stuff on the table to dick around with this too much.
My rough plan to read every book in the house as a means of passing the time in a somewhat more interesting way than refreshing Tumblr all day has hit a little snag. I started Focault's Pendulum, which is interesting but dense. I cracked open my copy of Guide to the Traditions as a way of interesting, lighter fare, but forgot that it reads like a fairly interesting textbook. I didn't exactly feel like starting a third book, so I'm just working my way through those two, and damn the time. I'd better get used to it if I want to get through Being and Nothingness.
I found my nWoD notes, so the next game is in prep. The game is very much like a book you start and found interesting, but the momentum never really builds up. I'm the kind of guy who likes going to and playing role-playing sessions, but the time commitment means that the only way I get out there is peer pressure. Running the game just makes that worse, so it's something of a life lesson. I'm determined, though.
Pathfinder is on for the 30th. It's a rough time slot for me, because it's Wednesday evening. Thursday morning is truck day, and the game's likely to let out at 11 PM, which means I'm in bed at midnight and up by 7-7:30. There's nothing really wrong with that, but I don't really thrive on that kind of schedule. It's the best that can be done, though, so I respect that call.
Tags:
Today is the very essence of a Sunday. I'm sitting with a comfortable sweater with a mug of Earl Gray a friend brought over. Friday, I stayed home and drank to calm my anxiety, which isn't probably very wise on the face of it. Into the evening, I got a little goofy. Like, nothing bad, just overly emotional. I've been something of a wreck; I'm really just keeping my head down, going to work, and staying home when I'm not there.
I'd really like winter to be over. It's such a bullshit season, if you ask me. What's so frustrating to me is that there are three proper months to winter (though it seems like we've really just got a hot season and a cold season here), but the whole Christmas thing starts in mid-October and goes right up until Jan. 1st, but we've got no proper holiday spirit to buoy us from Jan. to Feb.
If I had my way, we'd just have three months of low-level holiday buzz, lights, and holiday coffees, beers, spirits, and foods. Valentine's Day doesn't meet muster to me. It just feels like a late holiday grab after Christmas has run its course. I don't want presents, I just want some low-level cross-winter festivities that kind of ease the gray, cold days and long nights. I suppose I could start that, but all my friends seem to be partied out, and I haven't gotten paid yet even.
And that's kind of the roughest part. You wake up and bust your ass at work, but you don't have anything to show for it yet, and you're still going to have to pay off those debts and unpaid bills you accrued during your unemployed period. So, everyday, I tell myself 'keep your head down, it's not long now'.
But, you know, today I'm drinking tea in my warm house and it's a day off. I'll have plenty of time to complain when I work Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. Also, I think payday's Thursday. That's something to look forward to, also.
I'd really like winter to be over. It's such a bullshit season, if you ask me. What's so frustrating to me is that there are three proper months to winter (though it seems like we've really just got a hot season and a cold season here), but the whole Christmas thing starts in mid-October and goes right up until Jan. 1st, but we've got no proper holiday spirit to buoy us from Jan. to Feb.
If I had my way, we'd just have three months of low-level holiday buzz, lights, and holiday coffees, beers, spirits, and foods. Valentine's Day doesn't meet muster to me. It just feels like a late holiday grab after Christmas has run its course. I don't want presents, I just want some low-level cross-winter festivities that kind of ease the gray, cold days and long nights. I suppose I could start that, but all my friends seem to be partied out, and I haven't gotten paid yet even.
And that's kind of the roughest part. You wake up and bust your ass at work, but you don't have anything to show for it yet, and you're still going to have to pay off those debts and unpaid bills you accrued during your unemployed period. So, everyday, I tell myself 'keep your head down, it's not long now'.
But, you know, today I'm drinking tea in my warm house and it's a day off. I'll have plenty of time to complain when I work Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. Also, I think payday's Thursday. That's something to look forward to, also.
Tags:
.
